The Trust of a Husband

Proverbs 31:11 “The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain.”

It is a sad testament to where we are as the Body of Christ that this cannot be said of most husbands today. Many husbands cannot say they unreservedly trust their wives (conversely, neither can wives admit to trusting their husbands). Being able to fully trust your marriage partner is one of the fundamental pillars of a strong God-honoring marriage. So what is trust and how can we foster trust in our marriage and grow more like the exemplary Christian woman of Proverbs 31?

What is trust?
The word translated here as "trust" is batach. Out of the 120 times it is found in the Old Testament more than one hundred times it is translated as trust. It is a verb meaning, "to trust, to have confidence in, and to be secure in." Verse 11 concludes with the claims that, "he shall have no need of gain/spoil." The word "spoil" means "plunder or booty." It is usually used of treasures obtained by the victorious soldiers through war. By application husbands that trust their wives do not need to always be worried about material gain because their wives are not a liability. She manages the home so well and she is so industrious and productive that her efforts result in great gain and perhaps even profit. It is disturbing to see wives that through their slothfulness and carelessness cause their family to suffer. They may spend money without consideration or waste countless hours each week engaged in unproductive activities such as watching television. How can her husband safely trust in her if he is constantly worried about what she is or is not doing? How can he have confidence in her ability to keep the home while he is at work? (Please do not think that I am putting responsibility for all wastefulness at the feet of wives. Irresponsible stewardship of time and money is a serious problem in our society that effects men, women and children).

How do we foster trust?
Just as I wrote in the previous post on Proverbs; "The application to our life of these verses in our characters is that we first commit this work to God." Similarly, I believe that the way towards change can be summarised in Recognise, Rejoice and Reform, yet instead of repeating myself here I wanted to give you an example;

Having a clean and organised house is something that I believe is very important in the functioning of a happy and productive home. Clutter and mess seem to increase the tension in our home: we just aren't as kind or considerate towards each other when everything is all over the place. As a stay at home wife and mother it is primarily my job to keep the house and my husband trusts that during the day I am working towards just that. I have to admit that this has been difficult. My own mother kept a beautiful home, in fact she still does, yet she never really taught me HOW she did it. This is were A Virtuous Woman and the advice of Melissa Ringstaff have been so wonderful. How do you clean out your refrigerator? How often do you do it? What household products can you use to clean it effectively and efficiently? You may know this, but I didn't. The Divine Sonnets of John Donne, the diary of Dorothy Wordsworth, the letters of Rachael Henning... I knew all about these but cleaning the fridge - I was a bit in the dark. Melissa Ringstaff has written "The Homemaker's Journal" (one of many books on my wish list) which is full of practical instruction for the Keeper at Home. To tie you over until you can buy the print or ebook version, she has also written a number of short, point form, articles on how to clean and how often to do it. Click the relevant title below to download the pdf:

• Cleaning the Kitchen
• Cleaning the Refrigerator
• Cleaning the Stove
• Mealtime Cleanup
• Caring for the Bedroom
• Making the Bed
• Cleaning the Bathroom

Maybe this isn't an area you need to work on, maybe you need to work on prayer, devotional time, teaching your children, wisely spending money, being joyful giving hospitality etc. What ever areas God brings to your attention seek God through prayer and Bible study, seek the advice of other Christian women, and then slowly begin to implement change. If you aren't sure where to start you are more than welcome to post a comment and we will see if we can help. You can also email us if you prefer.

I pray that this has been useful to you and I look forward to your comments and thoughts

God bless,
Laura